21st Century Friendship

Friendship can be defined in a whole myriad of ways these days. Technology can either be a deterrent or a promoter of human relationships. With the advent of web-based relationships, things like Facebook, Twitter or even the humble email can either make or break a friendship.

I've always been one who's had a visible online presence. I've got 2 email accounts (Yahoo! and Gmail), I had 2 Friendster accounts (had to make a 2nd account because I had exceeded the then-500-friend limit), Multiply, Facebook, MySpace and Twitter. Name it and I've probably been there, done that.

But recent times have made me think twice about this. I've since deleted my Friendster and Facebook accounts. Why? Let me digress.

People - friends, in particular - don't talk anymore these days. So-called friendship is now based on what your status says and what you've been up to as posted on online photo albums. That's how we keep track of friendships these days. Nobody bothers to call or text anymore. There's no more use of catching up over coffee because that conversation has been replaced by your Facebook status. The saddest part about this is that people think this is enough. But I strongly disagree. Hence my drastic stance and delete my Facebook account. Tell me, do people really put EVERYTHING on Facebook? Facebook gives the user the liberty to update and upload only the things you want other people to know. Facebook gives the user the ability to screen one's life and give out this fabricated image of what you want others to think of you. But what about sad and not-so-good times in your life? The kind of times when you need a friend to look you in the eye and tell you everything's going to be fine? Is that kind of frienship/relationship now obsolete? Gone are the times when you don't say anything but when a friend sees this look on your face and know that something's not right.

I've taken a stance. I don't expect anyone else to follow or to understand but this is what I'm doing. I've gotten rid of Facebook and if I want to talk to a friend, I'll call. If I want to catch up, I'll organise coffee or dinner. It's also a good way to gauge who my real friends are. Those who'll actually call or text me to catch up and not simply hope that their Facebook status is enough to keep the friendship alive.